CLICHÉ of Malaysians

CLICHÉ 

Definition of CLICHÉ

1

: a trite phrase or expression; also : the idea expressed by it

2

: a hackneyed theme, characterization, or situation

3

: something (as a menu item) that has become overly familiar or commonplace

A cliche is not just something that lots of people say; It's something that lots of people say and it conveys some sort of idea or message. A cliche is, in other words, a metaphor characterized by its overuse.

A cliche is an analogy characterized by its overuse. It may be true ('Fat as a pig'), no longer true ('work like a dog') or inscrutible ('right as rain'), but it has been overused to the point that its sole function is to mark its user as a lazy thinker.

I am not quick to catch on Cliches used by people around me. I am often the last to know what it means or could mean and how to use them. Take for example,

• Aramati - Lets drink away ! I thought it meant Happy Hour but actually it means drinking sessions.
• Ini kali lah! - I have no idea what this means when my friends started using it, I started using it but they gave me stern warning about its hidden meaning. Only when I watched the Opposition Parties speeches then only I understood what it mean. The Cliche used by Opposition Party against the current ruling party.
• Boleh bah kalau kau ! - When I first heard it, I thought its a tongue twister or motivation phrase. Later I found out it could be sarcastic, making fun and used in negative manner.

Whether we like it or not, Cliches in life are many and they surface daily in conversations. Knowing how to use them will be handy. I predict the following Cliches will become steadily popular and well-known :-

• Listen! Listen! Listen! - Demanding audience full attention to what you are going to say.

I agree that Cliches are often overused and becoming meaningless or it does not carry your actual meanings. But it is cool to do !

Here is an interesting videon on how to use "Bah !"

My Happiness Index

http://happiness.teststipsandtricks.com/test/results.php?id=1

Free online Happiness Test

Online assessment testing of your happiness level.
Significant tips and tricks after quiz results!

Positive psychology is a branch of psychology which focuses in the pursue of happiness. Instead of focusing on depression, anxiety or pathologies, it focuses on what DO work for you to be happier

As the specialist Tal Ben-Shahar explains, happiness depends on the level of pleasure you get from your day to day activities, and the meaning you reach by performing these activities.

With our happiness quiz we will test your current level in various fields and after the assessment testing will bring you tips and tricks to improve your happiness level!

About Positive Psychology and Happiness

Positive psychology is a recent branch of psychology that focus on strengths and virtues that enable individuals and communities to thrive. This new branch was developed by Martin Seligman and Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi in 1998 and even though it is a new field of psychology, it is based on scientific methods.
It emerged as an alternative to 'negative psychology', which main concern has been negative emotions and pathologies and emphasizes negativity, misfortune and the corrosion of the self. According to the fathers of positive psychology, psychology up to this point, has been disappointing. Doctors wait in their practice for sick people, nothing has been done in terms of prevention and promotion, which should really be the main concern of a science that has as its aim, health. Positive psychology is centered on building on strengths rather than fixing what is wrong as it is rather a complement to traditional psychotherapy.
Central concerns of positive psychology:
• Quality of life: By having a healthy lifestyle, the chances of being healthy physically and emotionally are greater. Positive psychology provides people with strategies to regulate their behaviors. The core skill is self-control, which allows people to dismiss self-destructive attitudes.
• Forgiveness: In order to be happy, it is necessary to have positive emotions and attitudes towards the past, the present and the future. Forgiveness is an attitude towards the past that gives peace. To forgive is to change the perception of what happened, to take into account that people make mistakes and that does not makes them bad persons. Resentment is a poison and forgiveness is a gift to themselves not to other people.
• Resilience: It means individual´s capacity to cope with stress and adversity and to get through a difficult situation and come out of it stronger. Resilience is not a trait, it is a process that has to be fostered.
• Positive emotions: In the same way as forgiveness, positive emotions are fostered towards the past, the present and the future. This is fundamental to improve quality of life. Emotions towards the past are geared to gratefulness, calmness and satisfaction. These emotions make people feel happy and in peace with what they have experienced in their life. Emotions geared to the present are joy and love, which are benifical for health. Emotions geared to the future are trust, safeness, hope and optimism, which allow people to look into the future positively.
• Good mood: Most people that are usually in a good mood tend to feel better and those around them feel better as well. A good mood is like an antidote. People can look at the bright side of a difficult situation and do not take life too seriously.
• Optimism: There is no such thing as luck. With a positive attitude towards life and a belief that things can work out just fine, anybody can be 'lucky'. And also by seeing an opportunity behind a difficult situation.
• Self-steem: High self-steem is a sign of a happy life and a person that sees themselves as valuable. By contrast, a person with low self-steem is prone to depression; that is why, positive psychology fosters self-steem in prevention programs. Nothing is more important than loving oneself.
• Motivation: Motivation is connected with what people like and want, not what they should do, it is related to feeling pleasure by doing something. As it comes from within, it is intrinsic, it can lead to optimism and hope, which means that if any difficulty arises, people are likely to keep going, focused on their goals.

I did the Happiness Quiz and here is my results ! Oh boy, my pleasure level is so low, but I think I know where my happiness lies and the meaning of life ! Great !

Your Free Happiness Test results:

Positive Psychology, defined by Dr Tal Ben-Shahar as "the scientific study of optimal human functioning", aims to provide you practical tools for better living.

Results related to the science of happiness can lead you to tips and tricks that can really make you happier.

Your happiness level depends both on the level of pleasure you get from your day to day activities, and the meaning you reach by performing these activities.

According to your recent assessment, these are your current happiness level components:

Pleasure level	32%
Meaning level	100%

Pleasure level, tips and tricks

We don't need to radically change everything in our life, but often some small changes can bring about significant results in your pleasure level.

Contrary to what most people think, success does not lead to lasting happiness. The opposite is the case: happiness leads to success. Pleasure is key, as it brings us joy, an increased motivation and creativity levels and improvement in our relationships.

We suggest you to investigate potential Pleasure drivers and to retake our test afterwards:

Listen to your music. Stop everything you were doing now, select a random song in your iphone/ipad and listen to it without doing anything else but enjoying.

Be positive. Try to look at the good and positive side of every situation. Even when facing the worst things today. It's an exercise. Just try it and enjoy the challenge.

Laugh. Watch one chapter of any funny comedy that could make you laugh. Don't exaggerate, just one chapter.

Learn by chance. Take a book by chance and open it in any page and start reading for 5 minutes slowly, very slowly, trying to grasp every word in it, the way it is written, the rhythm of the sentence. Enjoy the form regardless the content.

A present for your present. Plan to give yourself a small present today, and do it. It could be a book, a song, a good meal, whatever you know you would like to receive as a present, even from yourself!

List what caused you moments of happiness yesterday. Try to repeat some of them today, at least in their essence.

Happy environment. Try to consciously surround yourself with happy people.

Make now a funny not-to-do list. Just enjoy planning what you do not want to do today, even if you had plenty of time.

Slow down. Try to take the double of time for getting to the next place you wanted to go to. Do it on purpose. Feel each step. Regard carefully every detail around you.

Meaning level, tips and tricks

There is a misconception in the belief that a happy life requires you to be empty of difficulties. Many people believe that the goal in their lifes should be the absence of discomfort and pain avoidance.

What IS necessary to have a happy life, is to feel on a daily basis that what we do is meaningful in our own terms.

Even if this changes from one person to another, there are some common activities, tips and tricks that could work for you.

We encourage you to investigate potential Meaning drivers and to retake our test afterwards:

Make others happy. Do at least one act in the following two hours, to make others happy. This can be a kind word, helping your colleagues, stopping your car at the crossroad to let people cross, giving your seat in a bus to someone else, or any other thing just for the other.

Think of solutions, not problems. For instance, apply this to the last concern you had in your mind, and at least three times more during the following 24 hours.

Eat really slowly. Take the double or triple of time for each bit the next meal. Pay attention to the sensations in your mouth, textures, taste..

Take a deep breath, hold it and exhale it slowly. Repeat this at least six times in a row. Do this at least four times a day and check if this helps you to relax and to bring your mind back to the present moment.

Consciously smile when walking at the street, specially to strangers. See what happens to them and to yourself internally.

Do some sport today. No matter if you wouldn't repeat it tomorrow. Just do it today and give this present to your body. Try to play and not to take it too seriously.

Rise earlier out of bed. At least 15 minutes earlier. And use that time for just breathing, holding your breath and exhaling slowly.

Organize your desktop now. Get rid of things you know you will not really use in the short term. Don't be afraid of this. You just need more space to feel happier.

Free your agenda. If you have already a very crowded schedule for today, try to take something out and plan not to do it. Replace it with something that makes you happier.

Be thankful. Take 10 minutes of your time, now, and think about what you have to be thankful for. If this was achieved thanks to or helped by someone else, try to show this person your gratitude too.

Positive Psychology

Positive Psychology by Tal Ben-Shahar

On 2 Feb 2013, we had a 10th Anniversary for our MSc GIS RS group at Kudos, City Mall with my most buddies and friends, Su, Pris and Wong Tai-Ko. Of course, as usual, Tai-Ko would motivate us with some deep philosophical thoughts and ideas about life and living.

He emailed out a Chinese essay to me about making everyday as special day and then a link to a You Tube Video and I spent the entire weekend listening to it. Frustrated by the bad network, I decided to download the video for repeated listening and learning.

Here are my understanding on Positive Psychology after listening to him few times :-

1. Permission to be human - As human, we cannot experience the constant high in life. Only two groups of people do not have emotions - psychopath or dead. We must allow ourselves to experience all emotions of life.We pay a very high for not granting permission to ourselves and others to be human. In life there is always Paradox and it is Not Passive Resignation but Positive Acceptance. This is the pillar of positive psychology
2. Dealing with Stress - We pay a very high price for our living ! The level of stress for college students have increased : 80% feeling overwhelmed and 45% of feeling depressed to the point of not functioning ! We have too much to do. Too much to do makes us feel overwhelmed and stressed. The average age for the onset of depression in the 1960's was 29 and now its 14. Step 1) Simplify - do less, rather than more ! Step 2)  Reduce multi-task ! When we do two favourite things at the same time Quantity affects Quality. Having emails / facebook on while working cause us to lose 10 IQ points! Loss of sleep for 36 hours is losing 10 IQ  Point, Smoking Marajuna loses 4 IQ point. Knowledge Worker should do 1 1/2 hour of focus time with no distraction.  Relationship between Money and Happiness is not clearly linked. Time Affluence Vs Material Affluence - we have time to appreciate the things and people in our life. The currency of Happiness - Time Affluence. We take time to love and to be loved. This is missing from our culture today ! Stress is not the problem but the lack of recovery from it is the problem. Ritualise the recovery of stress throughout the day through few levels - Micro level (Minutes, Hours 15 mins of lunch with a friend without phone), Mezzo level (Good Night Sleep is a good investment, take a day off in the week), Macro level (weeks and months - vacation). We need to engage with re-creation in order to create our life. 
3. The Mind-Body Connection - Overcoming depression by physical exercises, 30 minutes three days a week will make a lot of difference. Not exercising is like taking depressant and making us depressed and deprived. We are made to be active, the ancestors walked 8 miles a day ! We need an Exercise Revolution today ! Exercise makes more connections in the brain. The unsung hero of psychology ! Mindfulness Meditation - Deep Breathing, Prayer (One-Pointedness and Deep Breathing Belly Depth). Be in religious or simply deep breathing. Left-to-Right Prefrontal Cortex Ratio  - Active Left side Prefrontal Cortex will be happier persons. Take Three Deep Breaths for every opportunity throughout the day ! Learn how to breath correctly, it improves health !
4. Focusing on the Postive - Central Pillar of Positive Psychology. The gratitude and appreciate - to increase in value. When we appreciate the good in our life, the good appreciates ! List down 5 things that you are grateful for everyday ! Terminal patients with 3 to 6 months to life, they often said, "For the first time in my life, I feel that I am alive !" Appreciate the Ordinary and be aware of our breath and our life ! Cultivate the habit of Gratitude. Learning to count our blessings, gratitude letters and savouring all the positive experiences, the treasures of happiness.

These are ALL Common-Sensible Tips and we know all these things. Common sense is not that common when it comes to application. Make Common sense more common.

Here are the links :

http://www.talbenshahar.com/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tal_Ben-Shahar